People generally believe that women have a much harder time with divorce, and life after divorce, than men. However, as this revealing article in The London Telegraph describes, men suffer similar problems during and after divorce.
Misconception #1: Men have an easier time moving on to a new life and a new love.
In reality, men struggle with similar issues, including wondering why the relationship soured, how to handle the financial fallout and starting over, and dealing with the emotional trauma.
Misconception #2: Men have an easier time spending less time with the children.
In reality, men find the disruption to the relationship with the children the principal issue post-divorce. Particularly in homes where men served as the principal wage earner, men after divorce have more regrets about time lost with the children during marriage and the absence of time after divorce.
Misconception #3: Men think financially, not emotionally.
In reality, that perception is a stereotype. Men and women complain the same about the financial consequences of divorce – it uproots the status quo and creates a codependence post-divorce that can breed resentment rather than encourage healing. But men will say they feel constrained sharing the level of emotional hurt caused by the divorce; unfortunately, the stigma that dealing with emotions makes men appear weak still persists.
We think the important point of the article is not that men suffer more than women in divorce, but that both men and women suffer from divorce – financially, emotionally, and in other ways. The more that spouses can acknowledge both suffer from ending a marriage, the more both spouses can move forward during divorce to make good decisions for post-divorce lives.
If you have questions about divorce, contact us – we can help.