First, most divorces get filed after summer vacation and holiday season. Why? The article does not offer a reason, but we have found over the years that spouses tend to wait until after a planned vacation or holiday to enjoy one last fling with family as a unit, perhaps to see if that last gasp will give them a change of heart. It may also be practical – many vacations get reserved and paid for in advance, so why lose the paid vacation?
Second, age impacts divorce in a strange way – the younger you first divorce, the more likely you will divorce again. Why? This probably reflects a generational trend toward equal happiness in marriage prominent in young people, an idea more foreign to older generations that stayed married even if unhappy because of other reasons, many cultural.
Third, social media and the Internet have caused divorce rates to rise. While we cannot say this trend is not mixed in with other stronger reasons (what statisticians call covariance), one cannot deny that easy access to pornography and the prevalence of dating sites have made giving into temptation much easier today than in years past.
Fourth, men and women see divorce differently, with men taking a more practical view and women taking a more emotional view. In practice, we do not see this trend so neatly, but the gendered concept should be considered if you find yourself becoming too little or too much emotionally overcome during divorce.
Fifth, tell the kids right away. After a couple decides to end the relationship, it will become apparent to the children something is wrong or different. Rather than delay or pretend, be honest with the children and have a conversation together about what will be happening and reassure them both parents still love them and the divorce is not their fault.
If you have questions about divorce, contact us – we can help.