Using High-Tech to Cool Down Joint Custody Exchanges

On behalf of The Marks Law Firm, L.L.C posted in Child Custody on Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Let’s face it: even after divorce, former spouses can sometimes still feel anger rise at the sight of an ex. When the former spouses have children together, they are likely to have an abundance of opportunities to see their ex, of course, especially if they share custody.

There will be multitudes of drop-offs and pick-ups and other crossings of paths that might, on occasion, anyway, generate anger that results in heated exchanges in front of a child. That’s an outcome no parent really wants.

Technology offers a way out, or perhaps around, some of these exchanges, however.

In a recent article on the possibilities high tech offers to cool down custody disputes, the New York Times cited the case of a 26-year-old mom who says she and her ex quarrel every time they see each other.

“Normally, when you break up with someone, you don’t have to see them constantly,” she noted somewhat ruefully. “Now I have to see my ex and his current fiancée several times a week.”

And those exchanges figure to last until their two-year-old daughter is at least 18, and quite possibly beyond.

A way to shorten debates, discussions and arguments is right there in front of everyone reading this: the computer. Making use of e-mail, online calendars, texts, and other online resources can provide ways for former spouses to exchange important information without having to stand around and talk to each other — talks that can often go awry.

Many couples create a shared online calendar (Google offers a free one) that can be used to keep track of hand-offs, pick-ups, doctor’s appointments, school vacations, soccer practice and just about every other possible appointment.

Experts say these kinds of online tools are helping couples cope with each other and keep their children happier.

Source: New York Times, “ vs.,” Nov. 23, 2012

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