Divorce can be one of the most emotionally taxing and financially complex processes a person can go through. For stay-at-home parents in Missouri, the situation can feel even more complicated, especially if they have not worked outside the home for a significant period. In these cases, a common question that arises is whether the stay-at-home parent should seek employment during the divorce process. Some Missouri lawyers may advise against this, and there are several important reasons why. These reasons involve not only the financial aspects of the divorce but also legal strategy, child custody concerns, and the emotional well-being of the parties involved.
In this article, we will explore why some Missouri lawyers recommend that stay-at-home parents refrain from seeking employment during a divorce. We will examine the intersection of Missouri family law with practical and financial considerations and provide a clear picture of how getting a job during a divorce can affect both short-term and long-term outcomes.
1. Spousal Support (Maintenance) Calculations in Missouri
One of the most significant financial issues in a Missouri divorce is spousal support, or maintenance. In Missouri, spousal support is not automatically awarded in every divorce case. It depends on various factors, including the length of the marriage, the financial and non-financial contributions of each spouse during the marriage, the needs of the lower-earning spouse, and the ability of the higher-earning spouse to pay.
Section 452.335. RSMo states:
Maintenance order, findings required for — termination date, may be modified, when. —
1. In a proceeding for nonretroactive invalidity, dissolution of marriage or legal separation, or a proceeding for maintenance following dissolution of the marriage by a court which lacked personal jurisdiction over the absent spouse, the court may grant a maintenance order to either spouse, but only if it finds that the spouse seeking maintenance:
(1) Lacks sufficient property, including marital property apportioned to him, to provide for his reasonable needs; and
(2) Is unable to support himself through appropriate employment or is the custodian of a child whose condition or circumstances make it appropriate that the custodian not be required to seek employment outside the home.
2. The maintenance order shall be in such amounts and for such periods of time as the court deems just, and after considering all relevant factors including:
(1) The financial resources of the party seeking maintenance, including marital property apportioned to him, and his ability to meet his needs independently, including the extent to which a provision for support of a child living with the party includes a sum for that party as custodian;
(2) The time necessary to acquire sufficient education or training to enable the party seeking maintenance to find appropriate employment;
(3) The comparative earning capacity of each spouse;
(4) The standard of living established during the marriage;
(5) The obligations and assets, including the marital property apportioned to him and the separate property of each party;
(6) The duration of the marriage;
(7) The age, and the physical and emotional condition of the spouse seeking maintenance;
(8) The ability of the spouse from whom maintenance is sought to meet his needs while meeting those of the spouse seeking maintenance;
(9) The conduct of the parties during the marriage; and
(10) Any other relevant factors.
3. The maintenance order shall state if it is modifiable or nonmodifiable. The court may order maintenance which includes a termination date. Unless the maintenance order which includes a termination date is nonmodifiable, the court may order the maintenance decreased, increased, terminated, extended, or otherwise modified based upon a substantial and continuing change of circumstances which occurred prior to the termination date of the original order.
For a stay-at-home parent who has been out of the workforce for years or even decades, the potential to receive spousal support is a crucial financial consideration. Spousal support is often intended to help the lower-earning spouse maintain a similar standard of living after the divorce, especially if that spouse has been financially dependent on the other during the marriage.
If a stay-at-home parent were to begin working during the divorce proceedings, their income would be factored into the financial analysis. This can have a significant impact on the amount of spousal support they may be entitled to receive. For instance, if the stay-at-home parent starts working at a part-time job or earns a modest income, the other spouse may argue that the need for support has been reduced, even if the parent’s income is not enough to cover basic living expenses.
A lawyer may advise the stay-at-home parent to delay seeking employment until after the divorce is finalized to ensure they can negotiate a favorable spousal support agreement. The reasoning here is that maintaining a lower income during the divorce process may increase the chances of receiving a more substantial spousal support award. If the stay-at-home parent begins working and earning an income before the divorce settlement, it could undermine their argument for needing financial support and reduce the amount of alimony they would otherwise be entitled to.
2. Custody and Child Support Implications
In Missouri, child custody decisions are guided by the principle of what is in the best interests of the child. This includes factors such as the child’s emotional ties to each parent, the mental and physical health of the parents, the parents’ ability to provide for the child’s needs, and the child’s relationship with siblings and other family members. While employment itself is not a deciding factor in custody, a stay-at-home parent’s decision to seek employment can influence custody arrangements.
Many stay-at-home parents have been the primary caregivers for their children. This caregiving role is often a critical factor in the court’s decision regarding custody. If a stay-at-home parent begins working during the divorce process, it can reduce the amount of time they are available to care for the children. For example, if the parent secures full-time employment, the court may see them as less available to act as the primary caregiver, which could affect custody decisions.
The parent may also face challenges with arranging childcare, which could add another layer of complexity. Even if the parent secures a job with flexible hours, the cost of childcare might be substantial, potentially leading to financial strain that could impact the parent’s ability to provide for the child’s emotional and practical needs.
Furthermore, in Missouri, child support is calculated based on the income of both parents, as well as the custody arrangement. If a stay-at-home parent begins working, their income would be considered when calculating child support. While this may seem beneficial in terms of self-sufficiency, it may lower the amount of child support that the other parent is required to pay.
For these reasons, some lawyers recommend that stay-at-home parents delay seeking employment until after the custody arrangements and child support calculations are settled. By doing so, they can potentially maximize the amount of child support and maintain a more favorable custody arrangement.
3. Negotiation Leverage in Divorce Settlements
Divorce is not just a legal process but also a negotiation. Each party seeks to achieve the most favorable financial and custodial terms, and many aspects of the settlement depend on each spouse’s financial status and needs. For a stay-at-home parent, the ability to negotiate effectively in a divorce settlement often relies on their financial dependence on their spouse.
If a stay-at-home parent begins working during the divorce process, it can undermine their negotiating position. The other spouse may argue that the stay-at-home parent is now self-sufficient and no longer needs significant financial support. This could make it more difficult for the stay-at-home parent to secure an adequate spousal support arrangement. Even if the parent’s job is not full-time or particularly lucrative, the mere fact that they are earning an income could be used as evidence that they don’t need as much financial assistance post-divorce.
Moreover, once both spouses are seen as financially independent, the court may be less inclined to award substantial maintenance or a larger share of the marital property in lieu of a large maintenance award. Missouri courts are tasked with ensuring an equitable division of assets, and while equitable does not necessarily mean equal, the financial circumstances of both spouses play a key role. By waiting until the divorce is finalized before seeking employment, the stay-at-home parent can preserve their financial dependence and increase their ability to negotiate a more favorable settlement, whether in terms of a property division or spousal support.
4. Emotional and Psychological Impact of Employment Decisions During Divorce
Divorce is a highly emotional process, and the decision to seek employment during the proceedings can add further stress to an already overwhelming situation. For many stay-at-home parents, the prospect of re-entering the workforce after years of not working can be daunting. Navigating a job search, interviewing, and adjusting to a new work routine while dealing with the emotional toll of divorce can feel like an impossible task.
Moreover, adjusting to life as a single parent while managing a full-time job or even part-time employment can be extremely difficult, especially if there are young children involved. The emotional and psychological stress that comes with balancing work, childcare, and divorce proceedings can impair judgment and decision-making during the divorce process. For this reason, many Missouri lawyers advise their clients to focus on the divorce itself and wait until the divorce is finalized before entering the workforce. This allows the stay-at-home parent to manage the legal aspects of the divorce without the additional pressure of finding and adjusting to a new job.
5. Potential Negative Financial Consequences
Finally, it’s important to consider that entering the workforce during a divorce can sometimes lead to unintended financial consequences. For example, the costs associated with securing a job, such as childcare, transportation, and work-related expenses, may not be fully covered by the parent’s new income. This could leave the stay-at-home parent with little to no financial benefit from their employment, especially in the early stages of their career reintegration.
In Missouri, courts tend to look at the financial needs of both parties when determining a fair division of assets and spousal support. If a stay-at-home parent begins working and their income is minimal, they may still be entitled to spousal support, but this could complicate the determination of what is “fair.” Furthermore, if the stay-at-home parent’s income is too low to cover essential expenses, the court may ultimately determine that they are still entitled to a larger portion of the marital assets or more generous support.
In Missouri, divorce is a complex process that involves a delicate balance of legal, financial, and emotional considerations. For stay-at-home parents, the decision to seek employment during a divorce can have significant long-term consequences. Missouri lawyers sometimes advise their clients to wait before entering the workforce to preserve their negotiating power, maximize spousal support, and ensure that they have the emotional energy needed to navigate the divorce process. While every case is unique, understanding the potential impacts of seeking employment during a divorce is an important aspect of making informed decisions about one’s future.
Stay-at-home parents in Missouri should consult with an experienced divorce and family law attorney to fully understand the legal and financial implications of their choices, ensuring that they are positioned for success both during and after the divorce process. By making strategic decisions and seeking legal guidance, they can work toward securing a more stable and financially secure post-divorce life.
Should you need the assistance of an experienced divorce attorney in Creve Coeur and O’Fallon or have questions about your divorce situation, know that we are here to help and ready to discuss those questions with you.