How to connect and reconnect with kids following divorce

By February 2, 2012Child Custody

On behalf of The Marks Law Firm, L.L.C. posted in Child Custody on Thursday, February 2, 2012

Divorce is often difficult, whether it takes place in St. Louis or in San Diego, where divorce expert Nancy Fagan is located.

Fagan writes a column on divorce for the Huffington Post. Her most recent column discusses ways in which parents can reconnect, and stay connected, with their children following a divorce with difficult child custody disputes.

She writes that parents today embroiled in a contentious child custody fight should try to remember that most parent-child relationships “go back to normal once the family moves past the divorce crisis.”

However, that doesn’t mean there isn’t work to be done in order to restore normality to the relationship.

Parents need to understand that children go through a level of trauma when their family breaks up and their parents split. Those parents often must create and carry out a deliberate, thoughtful plan to reassure their children and reconnect with them on a variety of emotional levels.

Fagan says one way to reconnect with a young child after the divorce is to do something kids love to do: Play. Whether it’s playing tag, or with Lego’s, computer games or anything else, play is a great, natural way for parents to connect to their kids.

Another way to reconnect is by talking with children, allowing them to express themselves on their lives, their problems and their concerns. By talking things out, conflicts can often be resolved and problems addressed.

Another way to strengthen the parent-child bonds is to be a part of activities outside the home: Going to a movie together, playing sports or eating out, for example. You could also attend a play or other school-related event; a great way to show them that you’re interested in them and proud of them.

Source: Huffington Post: “Don’t Divorce Your Kids,” Nancy Fagan, Feb. 2, 2012