On behalf of The Marks Law Firm, L.L.C posted in Child Custody on Wednesday, August 15, 2012
When marriages come apart and parents divorce, no one is more directly affected than those in the family. But that doesn’t mean others don’t feel repercussions of the split. Among those affected are in-laws, friends, co-workers and your child’s teachers.
A recent Huffington Post article on the effects of divorces on teachers shed some light on the topic from the point of view of teachers. One woman who taught students at virtually every level — from preschool to high school — said that she’s seen parents who try to sabotage each other, parents who work together after a divorce and parents who try to “buy” the approval of their kids.
“Parents sometimes try to buy their child’s affection either through guilt or revenge on the ex-spouse, so the child gets what he or she wants, often to incredible excess,” she said. Kids are soon awash in expensive toys and clothes, she said. And as the children become teenagers, they are plied with expensive cars as well.
She said she’s also seen divorced parents make loads of excuses for their child’s “poor or inappropriate behavior, never once making the child accountable and responsible for his or her actions.” This excuse-making can, of course, lead to more and more unacceptable behavior on the child’s part; behavior that will do them little good as they grow older and enter the adult work world.
An author of a book on divorcing parents said some parents focus too much on their own experiences, forgetting that they have an obligation to reassure their kids that though divorce has brought turmoil to their lives, everything will be OK.
We’ll have more thoughts from the article about teachers, students and divorcing parents in our next post.
Source: Huffington Post, “Back To School 2012: Teachers Reveal Parents’ Biggest Divorce Mistakes,” Aug. 14, 2012